Denna text skrev jag 24.11.2018

Jag är havet som söker de oändliga rörelsernas inneboende dynamik. Punkten där rörelsen börjar utlöser kraften, som slungar iväg det som är färdigt att manifesteras. Inget att hålla tillbaka, utan ett fritt hängivet ja till rörelsen. 
Rörelsens cykel varierar enligt planens inneboende logik. Det som är menat att röra varandra gör sin uppgift med lätthet och nåd. 
Havet längtar efter klippans fasta kontur. Det låter sig sköljas upp på klippan och den mjuka kontakten smeker existensens djupaste skikt. När mjukheten möter klippans hårda hölje, då sker alkemin i mötet. Havet kan inget annat än foga sig till klippan och det gör det med glädje. 
Ibland med vindens ursinniga kraft som får det att se våldsamt ut. Ändå är det mjukheten i rörelsen som leder. Det oundvikliga mötet i enhet mellan elementen. 
Klippan tar emot havet och mjukheten gör djupa spår med sin ihärdiga längtan efter mötet. 
Längtan efter närhet. Längtan efter sig själv.    

My new book Letters to myself with Love is now published on www.adlibris.com after many years of inner emotional work and self-inquiry. I never intended to write a book, I was too busy with creating my business. I frankly thought it wasn't possible for me to reach such a goal and the market for self-help books was already full. 

I have over the years had to accept a whole bunch of new limiting beliefs regarding my own ability, especially after a sever burn-out and health crisis. It turned my world upside down and these texts in my book reflect that inner transformation I had to make in order to recover. That "illness" turned out to be a spiritual crisis and a call for re-connecting with my soul. 

In order to restore my health I had to learn a new way of living. I call it a co-creative way of living where you listen to your inner creative impulse and you have a strong belief that you are guided on your path when you live your purpose. On this path you live and create with love. You become part of an evolutionary impulse pushing you towards something new. As I had to realize in my crisis, the old way of living didn't provide me well-being. It was not my soul´s path. 

The texts in this book were written with the intention of helping others with the same challenges I had. I sent them out to my email list and I started to receive encouraging feedback about how they had supported people in difficult situations. After some years I got an idea of putting them together. Would there be enough of material to have a book? Yes, there was and it turned out to be a powerful book. 

Why is this book powerful? I invite you to read it in a new way. Not with your cognitive mind with the aim of learning a lot of content. It is not providing loads of content. Instead it is providing you a possibility to become aware of how the text resonates in you and your body with the knowledge you already have. What feels relevant and true for you? How do you know what is most important for you? You feel it in your body. 

You need to develop your most valuable instrument, your body to feel the resonance of the words. Do the words feel true? Do they challenge you to see something differently? Are you willing to open your mind and feel? What feelings are awkward for you at the moment? How can you practice your emotional muscles, your emotional intelligence?

Self-knowledge really opened the doors to me. Previously I hadn't listened to my own needs and I unconsciously didn't appreciate myself and my work. I have uncovered my deepest beliefs about life and about what is possible for me. I understood how language and words are creating the reality I live in. I have a choice and I can heal myself. These are the topics I write about and when you stop and practice being present with what the words make you feel, you will learn more and more about yourself. You are the most important person in your life and you are a powerful being. 

I use myself these letters to reflect on my behavior and feelings. Am I embodying the new beliefs about how I create my own reality or am I still allowing fear to rule in my life? Am I relating to myself with love or am I rejecting myself and my own desires and needs to please others? 

​Are you ready to embrace yourself with love and fully use your creative power consciously?

I hope this book can be helpful to you. It can be found in three languages: english, swedish and finnish. Buy here: www.adlibris.com
Said about the book: 
"Please read this book. Harriet writes very openly from her heart and soul, about very real life matters that touch us all.
Learn a fresh, new perspective with her help. Reading this book, contemplating her advice and putting it into practise is an investment in You. Are you ready for change?" Terhi V.
"This book is the path of love towards oneself. And throughout it, we approach the space that allows us to encounter the true essence of all the beings that inhabit the universe, merging as a unique soul on the road to liberate the self from earthly suffering." 
​Victoria Subirana

Welcome to Joy of Being!

I am now in a new landscape in life. A landscape where there are many nuances of expression and feelings. I feel like a container for the wholeness of life and everything that is part of human life is welcome. This is possible when there is love. Joy of Being is the answer of love. If there is joy there is a recognition of love.

Self love is at the core of this new landscape and it has been a topic I have struggled with a lot in my life. I had closed down the deep connection to myself and to my real feelings. I didn't listen to their messages. I didn't know that they mattered. I didn't know that they could and should be welcomed. I didn't know they could save my life and health. They did. Already back in 2006 when I started to learn about how emotional dynamics and heredity affected families I understood I had found something crucial. I learnt that emotional patterns can be destructive and that they are transferred from generations to generations. 

When I listened to a talk show by the norwegian Skavlan in april 2017 his guest was the famous author Yuval Harari, who has written the books Homo Deus and Homo Sapiens (which I recommend to read, they are so entertaining although having a serious message). He expressed his opinions on the future of humanity and the skills we need to thrive. He said that the most important skill for the next century will be emotional intelligence, but in his opinion there are not any good ways of teaching it.

Then I was hit with a creative impulse and inspiration. Yes, I want to create a new type of on-line process for developing emotional intelligence into emotional competence which is a highly needed skill both in families and in work teams. This skill I know from own experience can be the make it or break it thing - both in saving a marriage, in family relations and in making successful teams work towards a shared vision and goal.  

I had what I needed, methodologies to use (Emotional Dynamics and Heredity theory and Co-Creative Process Inquiry) and my own Intune awareness tools, developed to serve conscious leadership. The best thing was that I had found the right on-line platform with the greatest possible team to co-create with, which is Sutra, a digital platform being constructed to support deep, authentic connections for community building on-line and collaborative learning in small groups. I knew that emotional intelligence can't be learnt in a traditional format through lectures and materials. You need a different approach involving people to be both in deep contact to themselves and others, at the same time.

I found the Sutra team Lorenz and Natasha Sell in the Ulab-community, where people practice presencing and sensing the emerging future here and now. This is the co-creative way of working as I had explored myself with inspiring results for over 10 years. They were looking for people interested in learning in small groups. I know the power of collaborative learning in small groups after many years of teacher practice. I knew here is a great potential to create something of service to humanity. All the pieces were coming together after years of work. That is Joy of Being. To feel that now I can put all my capacity in use to support humanity in evolving towards a flourishing future. I had asked to be shown the right way of sharing my gifts and knowledge for the sake of making good. I wanted to live my purpose. The value of the emotional work has been life-changing for me and my family - both at home and in my work as entrepreneur guiding people and organizations to evolve and unleash their creativity.  

We started an iterating process lasting several months, trying out ourselves what could work the best and I experienced a deep joy to have found a team sharing my passion and purpose and with whom I constantly learn and develop! The first pilot was launched in august 2017 with two small groups with an 8 week content. We followed the process together, focusing on learning the key elements of how to create a safe environment for people to learn to be authentic on-line and how the interactions in the small groups need to be supported. We had a nice blend with audios guiding the exploration of the inner landscape, creative journaling and sharing in group calls. 

​The space in the group was felt as supportive and encouraging as the comment from the discussion shows: "I love you @harriet for inviting me into this magical space. I love you all for witnessing my transformation. I feel safe, loved , inspired and propelled (gently and lovingly) on my purpose."  

The work is very inspiring and we are offering the next personal transformation journey for those who are ready to evolve through emotional work and awareness starting on February 19, 2018. Read more and register at: www.joyofbeing.life Sign up to receive the weekly Joy of Being podcasts. Your Joy of Being is your most valuable treasure. Don't let it die under the burdens of modern life. 

I was not gifted with artistic abilities and I had totally discharged painting as a way of expression due to experiences at school. What I didn't know was that I had then closed down one of the most important tools for a human to be in contact with her authentic being. So I closed down my true authenticity. I adapted to the norms and I developed a harsh inner critic, that judged my mistakes and my "bad" quality work. I had a hard time accepting my shortcomings (that I was not gifted with artistic skills) and nobody could tell me back then, that one way of seeing creativity wasn't about the skills per se, it was about understanding myself and who I am through artistic, creative methods. That makes a whole difference!

The painting above is the outcome of a painful process of becoming visible to myself. I took a great course on-line The Art of Allowing by Flora Aube, who gently guided us in getting to know ourselves by painting. In the previous work I had my hair covering up my face, to paint a face seemed like the most impossible thing in the whole world. It took me some months to get prepared and ready and I had to make a real commitment to myself. I WILL DO IT! No matter what the result will look like, I will do it. This decision made a HUGE shift possible, my true inner power was about to be released. To finally let go of how I allowed myself being affected by what other people saw, their judgement about my ability or lack of ability. I never would have thought that I was so conditioned by the judgements of other people. In exchange for their acceptance I had started as a child to abandon myself. This pattern continued way up in adulthood and it is the root cause for many challenges in my life. To accept it as it is is the start for a real transformation and change. It is painful to admit, but very necessary since otherwise it will block my goals and desires.

Are you at a point where you simply can't afford anymore to block your true gifts and desires? 
What do you need to commit to and concretely do to show that you are serious about your work and dreams? 

It takes courage to create. When you see yourself as a creator, you lack being a victim. I have done years of recovery now of the conditioning from my upbringing, my education and my experiences created from the underlying belief systems imposed on me as child and youth. It is not about what happened to me, it is about accepting what I started to believe about myself and to transform that belief. To identify those damaging limiting beliefs that affect your actions UNCONSCIOUSLY is the hardest acceptance work you can do and should do. Here is your treasure hidden, since the toughest experiences hold the deepest rewards if you choose to accept your reality as it is and being visible with it. 

Hiding yourself from others means you are hiding yourself from yourself. That is a life without passion and purpose, a life only to survive in. You can find your passion and purpose and to your surprise you will find that the hardest experiences hold the seeds to your genuine passion and purpose. Don't hide behind any other person´s back or an ideology - embody your true knowledge and take ownership of your valuable experiences and trust that life will show you possibilities to share and uplift others through your hardships. In the best case, it can turn into  inspiring purpose-driven work. Allow yourself the best of worlds. Life is in your hands and there are good helpers to support your authentic expression.

 

​

Today is woman´s day. I wish all you beautiful women a moment of stillness to honor your feminine essence and wisdom. You are a unique expression of life intelligence, a universe in the universe and you have access to all you need. You are powerful and strong. You are soft and caring. You are everything.

The life force inside you tells a lot of who you are. Do you allow it to flow freely or do you suppress it? Your life force is your creative force and your sexual energy. Do you have a space where you can unfold and reclaim your life force? After years of being "nice" and achieving accomplishments guided from the impulses of the external environment, you might feel numb and dissociated from your inner being and life force. 

It is time to be honest and ask yourself some questions. 

Do I give time to my desires of the heart?
Do I honor my true needs?
Do I express myself honestly? Or am I just performing in a play?

Your life force is also your vitality. Your thoughts about yourself turn into matter, making you either feel uplifted, inspired and happy or depressed, sad and isolated. The solution is not outside of you. You need to look inwards, searching for the limiting thoughts and beliefs you are carrying about yourself. You can change your programming about your being. Nobody can define you. You are free to express your truth. 

Today we honor also the situation for women all over the world. We have come a long way in Finland when it comes to women´s possibilities to express themselves freely. However, nothing can be taken for granted. Things can change fast, conservative forces afraid of their own life force want to shut down the space.

Let us all take the space for our true beings. It is yours by birthright. All other thoughts are programming from the culture based on fear and need for control.  

Everything is created in relations and you were born through a relation. Relations are the cornerstones in our lives and work. We can even say that you are your relations. You become somebody through the eyes of another. We can always choose how we see each other, or how we don´t see. Being seen is a profound need of any person, whether at home or at work. Now we live in a time where we don't separate ourselves anymore from the work-I and the home-I. Now we seek work environments, where we can be authentic and real, where we can grow as human being as well as working with something meaningful. 

Have you ever thought about the quality of your relations? Are you performing a role, an expectation or are you co-creating in a living relation? A living relation means for me that there is openness and curiosity towards how the other is really thinking and feeling and what he/she needs. There is compassion and presence, genuine listening and intuitive knowing. A living relation is concerned about common interests, visions, topics, plans, development and there is a natural support for each others perspectives. There is space for being different, and thinking differently and expanding thinking and knowing together. A living relation always develop things into something more through the common co-creative space. There is place for silence, contemplation, not-knowing, which can really fast open up totally new perspectives. 

​Not all relations have the potential to be a living relation, and that is ok. But I highly recommend to seek for living relations and to think about your relations from that perspective. Your success and development depends on the quality of your relations, and sometimes it is necessary to make a revision of which relations to deepen and which to drop. A living relation at work can turn out to be your most valuable asset. But you need to put time and effort in the relation, you need to be willing to open up and share your inner space and soul with another. You must be willing to take a risk and be disappointed. A conflict has the seed to open up the relation to something more, and creativity can be unleashed.

To know who you really are is a life-long journey and you need to expose yourself to new people and situations to find out more about yourself. This is what we have been doing the last year in InTune and therefore not actively blogging. Inviting change is possible when you create space for it. One of the most important lessons I have learnt in this work, is that above all I need to be true to myself. The picture I shared here is from last sunday´s walk in a protected forest area in Helsinki. I felt one with the nature, the sunshine, the existence and I wanted to express my joy of being. Now when looking at the picture, still remembering the feeling of that existential joy, I have to be careful not to judge the quality of my being (am I good-looking or not). If I look at myself, my true expression, with judgmental eyes, the magic is gone. 

In nature, there are no judgements, everything just is as it is. We humans have made our existence a lot more complicated. At some point we started to be critical to ourselves, we started to be the worst enemy of ourselves and the results are seen now. We are lost, since we are guided by those critical love-less eyes, constantly concerned about what others will think about us and are we good enough. Keeping ourselves back, not sharing our true gifts. 

It takes courage to be true to yourself. You need to find loving eyes towards yourself, embracing all that you are. Accepting the parts you have been hiding in the shadows of the unconscious. When you face challenging situations, the reality becomes blurred and then you need to stop and listen carefully. Then you also need help to see, since the blind spots are too hidden for you to see by yourself. You need to understand the value of co-creation. It means you have been a part creating the challenge, just in order to be able to heal the unconscious wound you carry in the soul. Those people around you who honestly express their truth to you are valuable beyond words. With their help you can see where you are deceiving yourself and you can find the right track back to your truth. This entails facing your pain and helplessness (which we usually avoid as much as we can) but it opens the gates to miracles and quantum-leaps in your life. 

Therfore I have come to the solution that before we can see lasting changes in the world we need to come back to our true nature first. Understanding who we really are, and start creating from there. It is no use carrying wishful thinking about how you want things to change, you have to work on your mindset. I stopped completely this autumn, surrendered to listen to the wisdom within, what I call the wise leader. I will not compromise on being true to myself by pleasing other people. The highest good is not created in anxiety and stress. It will reveal itself to me, when I am true to myself. And it does. Believe me, it is the most rewarding feeling you can have when you start to see how the magic of life works. Welcome on the journey.